It either went in the van, or it went in the bin

We moved house. It was a little bit disruptive to all concerned and isn’t something I’d recommend doing unless you’ve got a week to waste.

All this crap went to the "recycling centre"
All this crap went to the “recycling centre”

The day of the move went surprisingly well – we got up, I got the van and we spent the morning putting boxes and things into it. This took a lot longer than we thought it would, it also consumed 3x the space we thought it would. Remember this next time future me, it takes at least three van loads now.

So glad we were only moving about 20 miles, had we been moving properly things would have been a lot more expensive and difficult.

At about 3pm we came to the demotivating realisation there was still yet more stuff and that we’d need the van for a second day. Fortunately we had a small stream of helpers which made things easier, without them I think we’d still be there now.

[pullquote align=”left|center|right” textalign=”left|center|right” width=”30%”]They sent us a list of cleaning jobs to do, one of which was to clean the tops of the light switches.[/pullquote]

Insert Tetris music here…

So moving day number 2 happened which was more relaxed and ended up with us removing the rest of our stuff and leaving nothing but a load of rubbish and mess to sort out the following day. At least we’d got all our stuff moved and now only had the tedium of tidying the old house.

Yes, it was supposedly “in our interests” to leave the old place clean and tidy because getting our deposit depends on it. They sent us a list of cleaning jobs to do, one of which was to clean the tops of the light switches. When dealing with a place that picky you just know it’s going to be fun getting your deposit back.

Clean your own damn light switches, I’ve just moved into a new place and can barely get in the front door due to the room containing boxes up to the ceiling.

The old house was good in that it was detached and near to the middle of town. The new house is better because it has a garage, is also near to the middle of (a different) town and instead of living next door to a corner shop I now live across the road from a supermarket. I went there yesterday and forgot my quid coin for the trolley so I just walked home and brought one back – it took longer to cross the road than to actually walk the distance!

New house is better because it’s also closer to mine and Amy’s works, and isn’t in an area where you get utter retards shouting and running about the streets vandalising your car at night. Also we have a conservatory and a weird house layout that confuses everyone who sees it.

New game - find the kettle
New game – find the kettle

I got to try out some things while moving house too. My car broke down near the old house so I got to use the warranty on it to have things repaired, and got to find out how good the breakdown recovery was. It was pretty good – they managed to sort me out with a variety of hire cars until mine was fixed. This also let me experience getting to work without my own car – something that wasn’t possible at my old house.

Did I mention the new house has a cellar? Or that it’s nearer the phone exchange than the old place so I get 13Mbit instead of 9Mbit. Slight bugger is that my ISP is being bought by Sky so it looks like I’ll need to find a replacement.

The rent’s cheaper too, and I got a £56 refund on my water bill and British Gas gave me “£100” as a reward for not leaving them. Of course they can’t just give me £100, it has to be smeared out over the next 12 months in little blobs. It’s also nice that Tesco didn’t stop my VISA card due to the really weird looking stuff I was doing to it. Three different car hire places withdrew and then refunded large amounts of money to it over the space of a week and it was used in a totally different town quite a lot.

That reminds me, I still need to tell lots of people I’ve moved house. It’s such a pain in the arse. Some let you do it online, others insist you phone them, some even want proof you live there which is kind of impossible until someone else posts you something.

Surprisingly not totally crap to drive!
Surprisingly not totally crap to drive!

I have to go and pick Amy up from work soon, it’s that shift where the trains stop running before she has a chance to get on them because it’s Sunday. Still, it’s a 20 minute drive now instead of an hour.

Did I mention she saves £25 a week in train fares too? And that her journey times are 16 minutes instead of 45? The new house also doesn’t have beige carpets.

Also due to the lack of previously mentioned cretins, we can actually open the curtains without fear of being broken into, or having random things thrown at the windows. And should I suffer momentary stupidity and forget to lock my doors one night, the front one is wired to the alarm and goes “BLEEP!” when the door opens, and the back door consists of the conservatory and two proper locking doors, and a locked gate embedded in the “tunnel”. Also the dog is strangely protective of the house, she was defending it from some birds earlier that had the cheek to sit on the washing line. She didn’t like the binmen at the last place either.

Our house is a terrace, there’s a tunnel between our house and next door that has a big gate on it. If you can get your car through this without scratching it (I failed) you get to store your car in a private little courtyard. In our bedroom is Narnia – we’ve got those 80s style fitted bedroom cabinets and in one of them is the entrance to a small store room above the stairs. It’s like something straight out of an Enid Blyton book, secret passages and all. If you open the big window in the cellar and move the grate you can climb out that way too (which explains the lock on the cellar door).

I don't live here any more...
I don’t live here any more…

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