Helpful Banking

Today’s life lesson – always make sure you leave the house with some money.

The wallet goes in the bag, the phone goes in the bag. The bag goes to work in the back of the car. It comes home in the back of the car too.

The car and its owner and the bag all go into the shopping centre carpark. The parking token goes into the car, the barrier lets the car into the carpark.

Now, standard operating procedure for this is that later, the token goes in the machine, some money goes in the machine and then the car goes out of the carpark, and life continues.

So the car”s owner goes into the boot to get the wallet out of the bag.

… and there we have a problem …

It seems the wallet never went in the bag, and is actually on top of the microwave at home.

So to recap ; the car is in the carpark, the parking token is in my pocket, the wallet is in the house. Money is nowhere useful (like in my pocket, under the driver’s seat, in the little pot I have for parking change or magically in my bag after checking it three times).

Oh dear… Oh dear… The car is in the carpark. Money makes the car come out the carpark.

Fortunately I live within walking distance of the carpark (I used to live in the Lake District, anywhere within four miles is walking distance…), so the only logical thing to do is walk home. Oh, this is the part of the story where I tell you it’s raining and my coat is in the office. I am not in my coat. But I have an umbrella. And a mobile phone.

And after ten minutes of walking and wondering “does the carpark accept paypal?” I remember… I bank with Natwest. They have that Emergency Cash thing. The Natwest app is in my phone… All my money is in the Natwest Bank.

"Hey mate, can I borrow 30 quid? I left my wallet at home and want to go shopping, ta"
“Hey mate, can I borrow 30 quid? I left my wallet at home and want to go shopping, ta”

It’s so easy – you launch the Natwest banking app, you press the little ’emergency cash’ button and decide “I’m here to go shopping… I’d like 30 quid please” and you get a little six digit code to type into the cash machine. The cash machine then gives you money. Not a temporary “we’re loaning you a fiver to get the bus home to get your wallet” amount of money but a “we’ll pretend you just put your card in the machine… you can have up to 300 quid if you like” sensible amount of money.

The money went in the pocket, then it went in the shops… and the parking meter and eventually everyone went home in time for tea.

Helpful banking, indeed!

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